Being the random thoughts of Greg Tito, age 29.

Announcements for my standup comedy gigs are here at gregtito.com.

Tuesday, December 19, 2006

What else are blogs for?

I officially quit my job three minutes ago. I was nervous and anxious all day because I knew I would have to tell my bosses I was out the door on January First like so many New Year's Resolutions. It is liberating. The copier doesn't work you say? Fuck you. You need some staples? Buy your own, bitch. The next two weeks are going to be awesome...

Of course, I'm just going from one corporate chump job to another but at least I'm doing it of my own free will. These a-holes were the first to hire me into this white slavery, and for that I thank them, but it's time I moved on from the lowest rung.

For posterity's sake, I am reprinting my resignation letter here. Ps. None of the names were changed to protect anyone. These are actually the fuckheads I work for.

Bob Jingle
*** Bedford Ave.
Brooklyn, NY 11211


Charles Fuckstick
The Bear and the Bull
Internal Audit Department
*** Park Ave
New York, NY 10022

December 19th, 2006


To Mr. C
harles Fuckstick:

Please accept this letter as formal resignation of my position as administrative assistant with The Bear and the Bull's Internal Audit Department.

Friday, December 29th, will be my last day of employment with the company.

I want to thank you for the opportunity to work with such a magnificent organization of enlightened, supportive, and creative individuals. It is sad to leave, but you are all flaming ass-mongerers. Fuck you, I'm out.

Sincerely,



Bob Jingle
Administrative Assistant


cc

Marvin Poopmaster
Bob Jewtard
Marshall McLuhan
Brent "I Touch Girls" Hamfist

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I once met a Muslim genius named Bilal Jewtard, but he went by Bill, not Bob.

Stephaine - yes, that's spelled right said...

Good for you! If I were you, I would find ways to make the next two weeks miserable for your co-workers. But then again, I'm a evil vindictive bitch. Down with 'corporate-America'!

Anonymous said...

Well done. If there's one thing you've learned from your acting work, it's how to make an exit.

Anonymous said...

Well done. If there's one thing you've learned from your acting work, it's how to make an exit.

Anonymous said...

Well done. If there's one thing you've learned from your acting work, it's how to make an exit.

Anonymous said...

Well done. If there's one thing you've learned from your acting work, it's how to make an exit.

Bob Jingle said...

Well, there's one thing you've learned, Anonymous, and that's how to press the submit button too many times, lol. Thanks for commenting everyone, I'm at my new job right now and I'll let you know how it's going in a few.